Except, said Allah, followers of Buddha, who did tend to be peaceable, and he would like to give them credit for that, and to apologise for what was done in the name of Islam to the biggest statues of Buddha in the world. Buddha said nothing as usual, but onlookers said they thought they detected a slight smile.14. The Christian God said that if they thought Buddhists were exempt from bad behaviour, they were talking through their haloes. Burma was one of the most Buddhist countries in the world, yet their history was hideously bloodstained…15. The chairgod intervened hastily to remind them that political point-scoring was a human vice, not a divine one, and at this rate they would be talking about sport, which was so far beneath contempt that even an Australian god would not descend to it, if there were one.16. An Australian Aboriginal god said what did he mean, even if there were one? There were plenty. And the Aboriginal folk didn’t play any violent team games till the white man arrived, so to that extent they were more civilised.17.

The chairgod said yes, well, he was sorry and now could they move on to the next item, which was the state of play in North Korea?More of this tomorrow, I hope
More from Miles Kington. Thousands of wintering geese that annually flock to the Hebridean island of Islay have brought a number of rare and unexpected visitors with them. A dozen of the geese appear to have ventured off course and flown a huge distance in the wrong direction, via Greenland, to touch down at Loch Gruinart for the winter, along with thousands of white-fronted geese, which are regular visitors as part of their annual migration.”Each year we seem to get one or two snow geese that have attached themselves to a flock of white-fronted geese and flown here in the wrong direction,” said James How, Loch Gruinart reserve warden. “They seem perfectly happy and will return to their usual breeding grounds in Canada in spring and rejoin their own species.”There are an estimated 32,000 barnacle geese on Islay this year, 8,100 of them have been recorded on the RSPB Scotland reserve of Loch Gruinart, the winter home to 12,000 white-fronted geese and a number of Greylag geese.However there are also a few other unexpected visitors, including a rare red-breasted goose from Siberia. The red-breasted species usually winters in Romania and Hungary although there have been a few sightings near Bristol, but seldom have they been found in Scotland.Mr How said: “It’s the second year we’ve seen a red-breasted goose and we believe it’s the same one. It’s an unbelievably beautiful species and we’re quite pleased it’s found it’s way here again.”There is a downside.

The geese that winter on the islands cause horrendous damage to crops and land – for the past seven years, Scottish Natual Heritage has paid out about £400,000 in compensation to farmer and crofters, rather than allowing the geese to be shot.. Only two British women have won gold medals at the European cross-country Championships. Paula Radcliffe, who took the senior title in 1998, has gone on to do quite well for herself at world level. How far Charlotte Dale, who won the junior version on 15 December last year, will go remains to be seen.